Ooooooooh bleach must have done wonders for your computer, I am trying to visualize you throwing bleach onto the computer just another funny shpitzle sight hehe.
Di kimst tzurik aher schnell.... in dee minute.... i am standing here on top of the ladder making pesachding the top shelfs, and handing things over to her and all of a sudden she is gone...
I feel left out, all this cleaning, I'm going to the in laws. The maharal said men do the checking b/c the wife usually did the cleaning and will take it for granted that it's clean. see that, you do the cleaning and they don't even let you do the official cleaning bracha.
That's it, I'm outting my foot down, this year no more outside and inside knife for peeling the fruit, I'm going off the derech, then I'm going to peel the fruit and cut it with the same knife, how do you like them apples?Not only that, i'm going to drink applejuice from a bottle but i draw the line at gebruchs, I'm not an outright apikores you know.
Is mixing posts agains the law? When I wore the cleaning lady's clothes, they seem to fit better.Just kidding, I won't drink the applejuice.
Good yuntiv. Heres hoping that not too many people pass out from their own "homemade wine"
CYL - Y’know, the more I think of it, the more similarities I get between cleaning and being clean.
There are bedikas, and bedikatz. There is a bur and a tup – both full of water. There is always another individual to double check if you’ve done it right. There is detergent to spare…. And of course… after that the man in the house becomes a melech…
Interesting.
BHB - I hate to be a klutz, but I can’t help it. Doesn’t tovolti mean tevilah (as in mikvah)? Where does hineni come in?
I should enroll for a Hebrew course ‘fore someone bops me in the head.
Nuch - Wella. It looks like your wife is also doing some extensive cleaning on the computer. I hope she isn’t finding too much of your chumutz.
frumbabe - oh?
Thereachossid - “see that, you do the cleaning and they don't even let you do the official cleaning bracha.” Are you trying to wake the feminists? Do you want to make us run in the streets like Paroi in Pajamas? Yes, sometimes it doesn’t seem fair.
Gasp! One apple and one pealer? Oy vey tatte in himle. Gib mir a baynkle. Help me breath. Doyres fallen!
Although, if you do it in less than 18 minutes it will not have a chance to become chumetz, so there’s a hetter…
Reminds me of the shmitziga carrots that were wrapped around whole shtuchim of farm, and the home-made borscht that didn’t taste too good, peeling thousands of potatoes for potato starch, then waiting for five dusts of air to dry out of it, making cakes that came out of the oven as one delicious layer yolk and the other layer of whites, preparing water for the whole yom tov in advance, cracking open 500,000,000 walnuts one at a time (and eating up most of them as they were hatched out of the shell. Mamma wasn’t happy about that)
Ahhh! Pesach back home!
I join you in on that toast. Cheers, to homemade wine that really stinks.
David - Sure. Use of my Mrs. Clean as much as you need.
Reb Shpitz Tlit"a, The mekibel in you comes out again!
Just to help you out some more, the Zohar says that the counting of the 7 weeks between Pesach and Shvuous is like the counting of the 7 nekiim of a Nidah.
Pesach is all about Blood (Korban Pesach, Milah, fingers from scrubbing too hard with steel wool), then comes Shvuous we eat Milchiks as the gemureh says that Blood of Nidah turns into Milk ("Dam Nekar Venaase Chulov" for all you learned apikorsim out there). BTW this is a proven biological & scientific fact. Ask any real (witch-)doctor.
I had never made the bedika-bedika connection though, so thanks, now I have a nice vort to say over by the seder to the shvigger. She will sure kasher me after that!
Shpitz, the sound of cleanliness is a "squeak". Not unlike the sound of mice (and men, when the headboard needs an infusion of wd-40). Coincidence? I think NOT!!
CYL - Brilliant. Medreyt miten genuk, and you say your wonderful peshetle about blood and taharah and whatnot. I'm sure you'll then hear of a new similarity. Murur.
Try it.
My question is: ni-ni, dee kasha iz git, but what's the teretz? What's with all the cleaning for women? Why? Why is there so much emphasis on a woman and materialistic improvements?
And the teretz iz... Avudim Hueeni... Knecht zenen mir...
frimhoze - Very thanks.
IA GN - LOL! I can't take that noise. Worst of all when it comes from mice.
BHB- Oh, oh, oh! No, with every tevilah in the mikvah, the bored mikvahlady yells out Kushahhr in deafening noises. Three times, for each set.
(I had a hard time understanding where you took the Hineni from. Yes, we also say "kosher" when we get home.)
the little rebbetzin cleaned my new computer w/ bleach water not to long ago... My brand new computer... that is.. Luckily it was ok...but I would not reccomend it. lol
Kushahr as in Tuvolti?
ReplyDeleteclever post! have a good yom tov
ReplyDeleteThat was a quick transition to your next post I can't imagine how you had time for this long drawn out post after the last one? lol
ReplyDeleteVery original! Sometimes you say it best when you say (almost) nothing at all. And to quote Simon & Garfunkel, "AAAAHHH, the sounds of silence"
ReplyDeleteFar mbrent der chumetz, di brochst brennen di timeh in kfireh fin dan blog. Siz shoin shreklich. Hashem yerachem. וכל הרשעה כעשן תכלה!
ReplyDeleteAnother option of course is to sell your chumetz/timeh/kfireh to me. Donations welcome. I'll write up the shtar...
BHB - Tuvolti? Is that the word you guys use?
ReplyDeleteCYL - :( Where’s the kafira here? No kafira intended, really. Just kidding about the obsession with women cleaning themselves and their houses.
lol. Good one! Perhaps your best post ever! (a bit too long though :-))
ReplyDeleteThe thought didn't cross my mind. I though you were saying "Kusher" to your bechers coming out of the boiling pot.
ReplyDelete(Hmmmmm, similarities?)
Don't forget to clean out the tub for the leibedika fish.
Also, do you know where I can find the online order form for the CRC Pesach Sugar?
Chanaya Yomtof Lipa - Ditto. Yes! It's those shy becherlich I was yelling at...
ReplyDelete(I gotta stop reading your comments while sitting. I end up falling over. Oh, god.)
Why the CRC sugar only? What's wrong with the salts? I can't wait for those salt-rocks.
Almost Frei - Oh, well. It looks like you’re all ready for the sedar, probably sunk into the home-made hessa bed. Have a good yom tov too.
ReplyDeleteSW FM - You got it! It was! You have no idea how much bleach I had to spray onto my computer.
IAGN - Garfunkle also said - “Ahhh, the sound of cleanliness”. Or maybe it was me that said that. I’m not sure.
Lakevent - It is a bit too long, indeed. But I don’t take no shortcuts…
not moi.
Almost Frei - Oh, well. It looks like you’re all ready for the sedar, probably sunk into the home-made hessa bed. Have a good yom tov too.
ReplyDeleteSW FM - You got it! It was! You have no idea how much bleach I had to spray onto my computer.
IAGN - Garfunkle also said - “Ahhh, the sound of cleanliness”. Or maybe it was me that said that. I’m not sure.
Lakevent - It is a bit too long, indeed. But I don’t take no shortcuts…
not moi.
LOL! A git yom tov!!
ReplyDeletehilarious, both posts
ReplyDeleteWhy, what do you say in WillyB? "Hineni?", "Come & get", what?
ReplyDeleteOoooooooh bleach must have done wonders for your computer, I am trying to visualize you throwing bleach onto the computer just another funny shpitzle sight hehe.
ReplyDeleteBaal Habos-
ReplyDelete"Hineni". Of the michen i'mzimen variety :-)
JBF -Good Yom Tov to you. Remember to stay clean out there ;). Enjoy the real board-walk. We'll have the amateur one made of water and flour…
ReplyDeleteAnonomonomous - :) :)
BHB & Skel - Please translate. Hineni?
SWFM - don't. It can hurt your eyes.
Shpits. Hineni - as in Esther Jungreis movement. "Here I am". You would say "hee-nigh-nee".
ReplyDeleteDi kimst tzurik aher schnell.... in dee minute.... i am standing here on top of the ladder making pesachding the top shelfs, and handing things over to her and all of a sudden she is gone...
ReplyDeleteshoin veiter zitstu dort beim computer
EECH VEL DOS FARBRENEN IN CHOMETS!!!!!
and this time i mean it!!
frailichen yontif! try a shygitz next time.
ReplyDeleteI feel left out, all this cleaning, I'm going to the in laws. The maharal said men do the checking b/c the wife usually did the cleaning and will take it for granted that it's clean. see that, you do the cleaning and they don't even let you do the official cleaning bracha.
ReplyDeleteThat's it, I'm outting my foot down, this year no more outside and inside knife for peeling the fruit, I'm going off the derech, then I'm going to peel the fruit and cut it with the same knife, how do you like them apples?Not only that, i'm going to drink applejuice from a bottle but i draw the line at gebruchs, I'm not an outright apikores you know.
Is mixing posts agains the law?
When I wore the cleaning lady's clothes, they seem to fit better.Just kidding, I won't drink the applejuice.
Good yuntiv. Heres hoping that not too many people pass out from their own "homemade wine"
very cute...
ReplyDeleteCan I borrow some of that solution..?
CYL - Y’know, the more I think of it, the more similarities I get between cleaning and being clean.
ReplyDeleteThere are bedikas, and bedikatz. There is a bur and a tup – both full of water. There is always another individual to double check if you’ve done it right. There is detergent to spare…. And of course… after that the man in the house becomes a melech…
Interesting.
BHB - I hate to be a klutz, but I can’t help it. Doesn’t tovolti mean tevilah (as in mikvah)? Where does hineni come in?
I should enroll for a Hebrew course ‘fore someone bops me in the head.
Nuch - Wella. It looks like your wife is also doing some extensive cleaning on the computer. I hope she isn’t finding too much of your chumutz.
frumbabe - oh?
Thereachossid - “see that, you do the cleaning and they don't even let you do the official cleaning bracha.”
Are you trying to wake the feminists? Do you want to make us run in the streets like Paroi in Pajamas? Yes, sometimes it doesn’t seem fair.
Gasp! One apple and one pealer? Oy vey tatte in himle. Gib mir a baynkle. Help me breath. Doyres fallen!
Although, if you do it in less than 18 minutes it will not have a chance to become chumetz, so there’s a hetter…
Reminds me of the shmitziga carrots that were wrapped around whole shtuchim of farm, and the home-made borscht that didn’t taste too good, peeling thousands of potatoes for potato starch, then waiting for five dusts of air to dry out of it, making cakes that came out of the oven as one delicious layer yolk and the other layer of whites, preparing water for the whole yom tov in advance, cracking open 500,000,000 walnuts one at a time (and eating up most of them as they were hatched out of the shell. Mamma wasn’t happy about that)
Ahhh! Pesach back home!
I join you in on that toast. Cheers, to homemade wine that really stinks.
David - Sure. Use of my Mrs. Clean as much as you need.
Reb Shpitz Tlit"a,
ReplyDeleteThe mekibel in you comes out again!
Just to help you out some more, the Zohar says that the counting of the 7 weeks between Pesach and Shvuous is like the counting of the 7 nekiim of a Nidah.
Pesach is all about Blood (Korban Pesach, Milah, fingers from scrubbing too hard with steel wool), then comes Shvuous we eat Milchiks as the gemureh says that Blood of Nidah turns into Milk ("Dam Nekar Venaase Chulov" for all you learned apikorsim out there).
BTW this is a proven biological & scientific fact. Ask any real (witch-)doctor.
I had never made the bedika-bedika connection though, so thanks, now I have a nice vort to say over by the seder to the shvigger.
She will sure kasher me after that!
Very good. I really enjoy your blog. Check me out at http://truetorahlife.blogspot.com/
ReplyDeleteCYLT -
ReplyDeleteWith hagalah or libun kal? ;-)
Very cute!
ReplyDeleteShpitz, the sound of cleanliness is a "squeak". Not unlike the sound of mice (and men, when the headboard needs an infusion of wd-40). Coincidence? I think NOT!!
ReplyDeleteCYL - Brilliant. Medreyt miten genuk, and you say your wonderful peshetle about blood and taharah and whatnot. I'm sure you'll then hear of a new similarity. Murur.
ReplyDeleteTry it.
My question is: ni-ni, dee kasha iz git, but what's the teretz? What's with all the cleaning for women? Why? Why is there so much emphasis on a woman and materialistic improvements?
And the teretz iz... Avudim Hueeni...
Knecht zenen mir...
frimhoze - Very thanks.
IA GN - LOL! I can't take that noise. Worst of all when it comes from mice.
BHB- Oh, oh, oh! No, with every tevilah in the mikvah, the bored mikvahlady yells out Kushahhr in deafening noises. Three times, for each set.
(I had a hard time understanding where you took the Hineni from. Yes, we also say "kosher" when we get home.)
the little rebbetzin cleaned my new computer w/ bleach water not to long ago... My brand new computer... that is..
ReplyDeleteLuckily it was ok...but I would not reccomend it. lol